” The root of suffering is attachment.”
We all know by now this teaching of Buddha, not only of Buddha; it’s practically a prerequisite for enlightenment in any traditional school of knowledge. This teaching says that one has to let go of attachments (attachments to people, attachments to things, attachments to feelings, emotions etc.) in order to reach a higher state of consciousness and become “a holly man/woman”.
This article is intended to be counter intuitive and to challenge this old teaching which I consider it to be obsolete with all due respect. It requires an update we could say because I understand the concept behind it but I believe it should be rephrased and properly explained.
When you teach people to let go of attachments let’s say for family, friends they generally understand that they would become some kind of cold blooded, insensitive human beings. It is actually not the case at all. The idea is to stop seeing these relationships from a limited perspective. It means you can hold such a higher perspective that you are in complete understanding of their dinamic, you understand why things go wrong when they go wrong, you understand the purpose behind conflicts or struggles.
One can actually get triggered and experience let’s say anger for a short time but simultaneously the same person can be aware and hold this higher understanding which changes the game completely. Awareness changes the vibration and everything happens in a more “innocent” manner.
Let’s consider a state of conflict, no matter how spiritual one is, he or she can still be triggered and act on emotions apparently. But lessons are being learned fast, as fast as the conflict develops and then ceases to be a conflict in no time since the purpose has been reached – lessons learned, reasons have been understood. There is no attachment to conflict, the is no interest in holding grudges. This is what we call spiritual maturity or wisdom.
In 3D you can be a Buddha and you are still bound to experience opposites in emotions / feelings / actions / speaking. It’s very different though since you will not get attached to them for too long and they will happen at a superficial level of your awareness.
Let’s consider attachment to a goal. Spiritual or not, anyone has the right to pursue a goal and invest as much energy into it as wanted. Somewhere at the core of your heart be detached enough to accept that change can happen any moment, that maybe destiny has something else in store for you, that it’s about the journey no matter what happens. Be detached enough to welcome failure or success without damaging your heart.
It’s like holding two points of focus in the same time – the human/ego perspective and the enlightened / Buddha perspective.
It’s like a dance between these 2 points of perspective a dance of balance, a dance of life infused with soul wisdom and guidance.
Let’s consider one more attachment for the sake of offering as many examples as possible. Attachment to a very dear one – a son or a daughter. How could anyone not be attached to their children right? Does it mean they don’t stand a chance to enlightenment?
Of course not. It would be a different kind of attachment though.You would not be obsessed with your dear one in a way that you loose your ability to be objective when required. You will “use” your attachment to refine it and to raise and educate a child to be free, free of yourself, free of fears but bound to his/her heart. Your sense of fulfilment in life would not be his responsibility.
Can you imagine a Buddha who loses his child being so detached that he could bypass suffering? No. It’s just that he suffers with a higher level of understanding. He can see this event in the grand scheme of things, as cruel as it may sound it makes sense to him. He will suffer just as he would be happy, he would immerse himself in these emotions but feeling safe. It doesn’t matter to him how excruciating is the pain or how overwhelming is the joy, he welcomes both but dwells behind them.
So, accept your attachments but work on refining them, they are teachers to you. Feel whatever is there to be felt with courage and fearless, suffer if it’s time to suffer, be happy when you have a chance. But have your roots in reality, that subtle reality of your eternal self. If you don’t have any experience of this aspect of your eternal self, trust your soul you must have some sense of it. Or maybe you want to call it God. Trust God!